Parents Who Have Lost a Child | Can Ask Meh?
How did your child pass on? Did you blame anyone for what has happened? How do you deal with grief? These are some of the questions that parents who have lost their child answer on this episode of 'Can Ask Meh?'
If you need help, approach a counsellor at Child Bereavement Support, Singapore via www.cbss.sg or email to help@cbss.sg
'Can Ask Meh?' Full Season 2: bit.ly/OGSCAMS2
SUBSCRIBE TO US!
bit.ly/OGSPLclip
Have any stories or feedback for us? Let us know through this form! forms.gle/V2ZxKfta6Gfd4jmPA
This video is part of our Offbeat series. Welcome to our no-judge zone, where nothing is off-limits. Join us to create open, honest dialogues for a more progressive society.
Find #OurGrandfatherStory everywhere!
IG: ourgrandfathers...
FB: ourgrandfatherstory/
FB Group: groups/ourlittlekampong/
Telegram: t.me/ourgrandfatherstory/
For media releases, events and invites: press@ourgrandfatherstory.com
For business enquiries: limkopi@ourgrandfatherstory.com
Komentarze
WATCH MORE CAN ASK MEH? EPISODES: S4 Playlist: bit.ly/OGSCAMS4 S3 Playlist: bit.ly/OGSCAMS3
Markus Davion
2 dni temu
dunno if anyone gives a shit but yesterday I hacked my girl friends Instagram password using InstaPortal. Cant link here so search for it on google ;)
ShaellyWork
27 dni temu
hi everyone ,if anyone else is searching for best way to give up smoking try Lomonting Quick Cease Mentor(do a google search ) ? Ive heard some amazing things about it and my friend got amazing results with it.
Kevin Andrean
6 miesięcy temu
@ً sorry, my pocket did that 😂, i'm not realize for do that😂
-IceyLemon-
6 miesięcy temu
Kevin Andrean ?
ً
6 miesięcy temu
Kevin Andrean what lol
so this is how parents feel after losing their children. when my brother passed away with cancer, my dad wouldnt even show us how hurt he felt because he didnt want us to see him crumble when he believed he was supposed to keep us strong. i felt so sorry knowing that. it's been a few years now but sometimes, we'd still find him sat quietly and most of the time we just know he's thinking about my brother and all the what could have beens if he still lived.
Often I overthink and wonder if this is how my parents would react if I die. I need a hug :(
Thank you for sharing your children with us. ❤️❤️❤️
Lord Jesus loves you 🤍
I just got a fight with my mom this morning. I have a depression but i refused to tell that in my family or anyone, but to myself. Watching this video might help me to appreciate life more. I yelled at my mom earlier because i can't really take it anymore then she said we need to go to the doctot so that you'll need your help but i refuse, because i believe that only myself can help me, i wasn't thinking suicide that much but i used to think about it, but I don't want to get hurt. I just want to disappear. There's so much in this world I don't see yet, maybe there's so much more. Maybe there's a hope. Maybe there's another chance for us. Let's live together folks.
AFTER WATCHING THESE VIDEO I UNDERSTOOD THAT MY PROBLEMS ARE REALLY NOTHING, I UNDERSTOOD THAT I SHOULD NOT MAKE MY PARENTS SAD....
honestly disgusted with the ads on this video, capitalising off of others grief is a different kind of sick.
If I stood with him 24/7 until the rest of my life he could be alive until I died...wow that broke my heart. Only a mother could really do that for another person
i will never ever be strong like those parents
No one believes that im depress and i keep telling my dad that i need to see someone but i think he doesnt think im serious.
Idk I'm speechless
Im literally crying. 2 years ago, I 2as really depressed and I want to end my life. Many people just saying Im just being emotional and telling me to end my life if I really can. Im thankful I have a friend who cheered up on me. His mother and brother died because of pregnancy. His father abandoned them. He is more depressed than me and I know that. Now, he has a child and now he is a doctor and her wife is also a doctor, Me, Im still studying, and Im tutoring their daughter. I did not end my life. My old friend was very depressed and never thought of ending his life, and I think I should have that mindset. Don't let emotions kill you, value people who loves you. This life was just borrowed from the above. Be happy, let's be happy♥️
My life ended 22 years ago. I lived thru the motions of pretending everything is fine. My daughter is gone before she turned 7. I can't wait to see you again.
Fun fact: I am a surviving twin who lost their sibling before being born. Reason: I ate the twin (yeah i like to joke about it XD)
The only reason I am living is for my parents but they’re also apart of the reason why I’m depressed 😔 I just hope my parents could understand me without doubting me. It’s hard for me.. and I have no friends and got bullied. I went to a guidance counsellor but she didn’t help me at all and only said ‘do your school work’ and betrayed me. I feel like I tried getting help but I ended up getting hurt. I’m not living for myself, i just don’t want to hurt my parents 🙁 it’s sad that they probably would take it serious after I decided to end it.
This is just so heartbreaking to watch. Salute to all parents out there!!
LOSSING YOU BABY/CHILD IS THE MOST TRAMATIZING THING IN THE WORLD
I know a lot of people believe in karma, but to whoever said to these parents that what happened to their kid is a karma, imma punch you in the face like for real
I hated when people told me "you have an angel baby now". No. I had a dead baby. Humans don't turn into angels. Bad theology doesn't make me feel better.
Now I can understand my mum better. She lost her only son, my brother.
The only reason I haven’t committed yet is bc I can’t leave my mom and my brother.
I'm not even a Mom but I feel the sadness.
I always get emotional with these kind of videos, but since I started thinking about taking my own life seriously everytime I see a griefing parent I just cry my eyes out and feel guilty for even thinking about it. But life is so hard. I just hope it really gets better as they say. Lots of love for everyone on this video, you and your kids didn’t deserve this,
Bagas Ha
6 dni temu
Hang in there!! I was had this "what if i just dissappeared from life?" kind of think when i hit the harddest bottom of my life. But i manage to pass through it and i'm glad i didn't gave up back then. Life is still hard, but for sure i'm happier now. So, hang in there!! You'll meet the rainbow of your life once you get through your "storm" 😊
My mum lost a child too and i lost my big sister, even though the reason for the death is different, the pain is the same. May all their souls rest in peace ❤️ I am a strong believer of a reconnection, after once own death until then, i try to live my life day by day. I wish everyone strength 🍀
i have to say, the only moment i think about dead, at that moment, i hear my mom’s laugh from the next room. Her laugh saves my life. It gives me the whole life again. Knowing what I am living for.
It happened on my birthday :( sad. Prayers
Someone actually told a grieving parent it’s karma!? 😱 people are nasty!
When she had to make the decision to let him go..
my mother had 6 of us 4 of us died while were baby and just me and my brother are alive
This was way too sad. Stay strong y'all 💜
All the parents that lost the children are the heroes. I just cant imagine how hopeless they're when they wake up everyday and face to tragic. I know and I understand how much pain they have to escape when their child pass away, it was completely torment. Stay strong, please !
condolences - PH 2X
These people are so strong wow... about the two women who’s kids passes away by suicide...that um hit me kind of hard. TW!!! bc I’m kind of suicidal and um I didn’t think it would impact or how others would feel..
MAKES MY CRYING BUT HEY THEY'RE STRONG PARENTS. SENDING PRAYERS FOR ALL PEOPLE ♥
im crying so much
After seeing this no matter how much pain I'm in but I can't hurt my families like that even if they are the ones who got me depressed I just can't
Guys I just want to hug and cry with them 🥺❤️
I was watching this to remind me how my parents would feel if I were to leave them early.
This is so sad :(
no tengo fuerza para escribir tanto ni procesar, ver esto me hizo llorar tanto que me trajo viejos recuerdos, ¿que hace que alguien quiera morir? no hay respuestas, como una persona con depresión atípica diagnosticada es muy complicado mantenerte a flote, desde que tengo 10 años debido a diversos tipos de violencia hechos hacía mí desarrollé mi depresión y asma, quería aislarme socialmente y comencé a cortarme, actualmente no recuerdo mucho de lo que me pasó pero sé que sigue doliendo, es como si hubiera bloqueado todo, pensé en saltar de los puentes o de la escuela miles de veces, tomar cloro, escaparme de casa y que alguien me matara... mi mamá encontró mis diarios llenos de palabras como "muérete" y peores cosas, descubrió mis cortadas y todo eso, nunca quise ayuda porque ni yo misma sé que pasa, esto fue a los 12 años, con 18 años llevo miles de recaídas y más heridas, llevo menos de un año de terapia y me siento en un hoyo muy profundo que me hace ahogarme más al tener a gente tan linda preocupándose por mí, me hace sentir culpable. he pensado en el suicidio muchas veces de nuevo y me he lastimado, sigo luchando, espero resistir porque es tan difícil sentirse de esta manera y que nadie lo entienda o lo note solo por una sonrisa o humor en la gente, ¿que podía hacerla querer morir? cuando no tienes nada y la gente cree que tienes todo es la peor tortura aplicada. lo peor es que te "idealizan", créeme que no puedes con una chica con depresión, deja de jugar, ni yo misma puedo conmigo para que ideliaces algo, a veces rompo cosas sin querer, me corto el cabello o perforo al no poder controlarme, corto lazos y digo cosas herientes, ese tipo de persona NO es un tipo ideal, es solo alguien intentado superar sus problemas mentales. tengo tanto que decir y nadie a quien hacerlo porque yo soy el "sol" de la vida de mis amixes. gracias por leerme, es muy difícil.
Sxntixgo M.
10 dni temu
Entiendo casí todo lo que has descrito de tí, vivo algo similar, un consejo que te puedo dar, es que lo hables con alguién de tu confianza, expresale a esa persona todo tu sentir, aunque te responda con un "ok" no tengas miedo de contarlo, de esta misma manera que lo hiciste acá, encontrarás a alguién que te hará cambiar tu forma de ver las cosas, la música es algo que te recomiendo mucho, escucha cosas no depresivas, cosas que te hagan bailar, mover el cuerpo, aunque sea dentro de tu habitación, a escondidas, toma mucha awita :) No está sola chica desconocida, las cosas van a mejorar, tarde o temprano, sé paciente, por experiencia te lo digo, sé muy muy muy fuerte, te deseo lo mejor, muy buenas vibras a tu vida.
I recently lost my stepmother to suicide 26 days ago and she left me with so much and taught me so many things, and she taught me another, and it's that you arent alone in this world. There is always somone there who cares for you, I've thought about doing it myself before. But it's so hard on everyone else, to anyone who has ever thought about it please never do it. There are people who care about you and love you. Losing someone is tough and sometimes you never fully recover. Some people have demons they cant fight anymore. R.I.P Jessica I'll love you forever, miss you
This video had me in tears. Honestly, I thought many times of “kicking the can”/“saying goodbye to this world”. 2020 hit me hard in life due to this pandemic. Lost my job, lost my future property for my wife and newly first born son. Life threw me backwards. And until now I’m still battling depression and hoping I find a job to support my family needs.
young lives gone just like that. we the fortunate ones need to cherish what we have and start living.
When the parents know that their child is going to die then they will give them the true happiness.
So the PLclip algorithm being a dick to me yet again
I could never be a parent. I’m sorry but the thought of a kid being hurt, or killed makes me too emotional. I’d cry so much. I could never be a parent
the lady who lost her baby is so strong, I pray she is doing well
Well good I know that my friend's mum has lost her kid and my friend is actually her second kid atleast from that what my mother told me lately my friend's mum is so worried about my friend that my friend is not even allowed to stay over with me only because i live in town even that it's actually not town as town I cried a lot about this especially about that i live in "town" my friend's parents are weird i know that they care about my friend i know that they're afraid about my friend but at the same time they are able to blame my friend for whatever and be toxic to my friend and i can't understand why sometimes it seems to me so toxic how much they're trying to control my friend
Oh God 🙏
i dont think i have any mental issues but every time i wake up, the first thought is "ok,, will today be a good day?" a few seconds later, everything drops, and my head is filled with su!c!dal thoughts. it fogs over everything. i cant focus on anything because those thoughts are constantly spinning. im only 14, so like my mom said, this is probably just hormone things.. i want to go to a therapist and find out if there IS anything wrong with me. ive been stuck like this for 8 months. longer it went, i wanted it to disappear but i dont know what i would be doing if it did. i picture myself happier and enjoying life,, and it doesnt.. it feels weird. only 8 months but it turned into a home. it feels like something i cant live without. the emptiness, self hatred, cutting, numbness, no desire to eat, nothing to hope about, etc. i dont cry anymore. its hard for me to cry, idky. nothing really hurts me to the point i cry. i *want* to cry everyday, everynight but it never happens. 3 days ago, my parents asked if i was stressed and i said yes. i was balling my eyes and they asked, "why are you stressed? is it school?" i tried to think why, but i couldnt think of anything. it just hurt sm when they brought up stress. "i dont know", i answered and my dad was frustrated that i didnt give him an answer. after more talking, and talking. i ended up, scrunched on the groud, hugging my legs and crying so hard and so much that my heart felt bruised. it hurt, the crying and my thoughts hurt. i almost screamed so loud as if someone was burning me. i want to cry like that again. it felt terrible but good. to be able to release something other than just words and through music. +i came to watch this so i find a reason to stay longer. it did kind of help, sadly it kind of helped. releasing what it does to parents after their kid passes..
wow im sorry mom if im thinking of taking my own life everyday :)
❤❤❤
9:20 - 9:40
I hope Max's mother got some mental help with some of the things she said about not wanting to live anymore. I wish these families peace.
I cant stop crying, teringat cerita teman yang memiliki hubungan kurang baik dengan ibunya. Aku ingin lebih dekat, bisa peluk dan ucap jangan berenti karena aku sayang aku mau lihat hari besok dengan kamu. Ada aku disini yang nunggu cerita kamu
“Evan never even made it do the hospital, his body was on the floor and, I held him, I shook him, talked to him and, screamed at him and, did everything, but he just didn’t respond and, neighbors came down, tried to resuscitate him, and blood started coming out of his ears, I just told them to just stop, because I knew he was gone.”
i honestly rlly love my parent , family and other but i see no point on it, i dont know why i should live until old age , so i want it to end . i think its better if i leave than maybe my parent could use the money for more good things
Only parents who lost children know that children aren't used for bragging , fame or money. Children are humans not slaves, not an object to whip if it doesn't do well. Not a dummy to punch or yell at, not a piece of meat waiting to get slapped. Children aren't show and tell objects, they aren't used for wechat show offs. They aren't material. Just stop, we children had enough
Few years back, I was going through depression because of certain things that I was going through. At some point, I felt like giving up my life. I did thought of my parents once, how they would feel if I am gone forever. Today, watching this video & thinking about those time, it made me realize, thankfully I didn’t took the wrong step. I can’t imagine my parents suffering.
who's here to get their daily dose of tears
I am so sorry for the loss of your precious sons and daughters :( my heart breaks for your pain
a man who loses his wife is called a widower a women who loses her husband is called a widow but when a parent loses a child, there's no word invented for that. because the pain is so unimaginable, you could never put it in words. Heo Yunjae.
Not to blame Evan's mother, but I really find it weird and it makes me so mad that when she found out he wanted to lie about not having school that day, she could've asked WHY and NOT tell him that "No matter how things get hard, you shouldn't be lying." She was right about not lying, but she could've had a little more empathy and find out why her child wouldn't want to go to school. Your children SHOULDN'T be afraid of being honest with you. Children should always FEEL SAFE telling you how they feel and they shouldn't be afraid whatsoever. Parents should learn not be too pushy, you do not know everything. I have a gut feeling that he was bullied, but his mother had no idea at all.
Piolo Nico Mangabat
18 dni temu
@Angeline Anastasia It's pretty obvious there's something Evan wanted to tell her mom but CLEARLY he couldn't, that's why he was apologetic before he committed suicide. "I'm sorry, mom. I'm sorry, I'm sorry." was all he could tell her??
Piolo Nico Mangabat
18 dni temu
@Angeline Anastasia lol my comment might be insensitive but there's some truth to what I said. Some parents are just too pushy and insensitive. Even I am scared to tell my own parents some things I know they wouldn't bd able to accept. But it SHOULD BE their responsibility to keep their children safe. Every child should feel safe to tell their parents what they're going through and that something is WRONG. Sorry not sorry, but the mother is part to blame. Kinda insensitive to say but, it's the truth.
Angeline Anastasia
18 dni temu
You weren't there when it happened. You don't know her. You don't know what she knew or didn't know. Your judgement is based on a short recount less than a minute long. Please dont leave comments like this to parents who are grieving, whether actively or not. Your comment is extremely insensitive, as it implies blame. She already struggles on her day to day life, handling 3 kids, she does not need to read this. She was brave enough to share her story, and we should be focusing on that instead.
This made me depressed😞
I came here after losing both my grandparents in the span of 9 months. I watched this back in may when grandpa died from a stroke. Yesterday my grandma joined him, it hurts even though I know that's what she wanted. I never got to say goodbye, I never got to attend a funeral due to covid. That's the hardest part which is probably why I'm in denial. You can't say goodbye, you don't see their body. I went to the graveyard in August after I'd finished my exams and we'd gone back to Italy. I don't know when I'll see my grandma, maybe March. I have exams now and I'm alone at uni. So alone.
My mom told me there’s no such thing as depression
Some parents always scold their children for not appreciating them but I think people forget to take the time to appreciate their children until it's too late
I feel so bad for the parents that lost their child to suicide. Not that losing your child any other way is easier, It's just that depression is such a fucking sick disease. Both families probably suffered from their own forms of depression already and to have such a traumatic experience weigh in on top of it, it hurts my heart. You can physically see the toll it's placed upon them. I just hope that they can find happiness again. To anyone reading this, just remember the best thing you can do for anyone who has passed is to live your life the way they couldn't.
I have seen a case like the indian lady's situation where a woman and her husband split after the baby died, it is not fun for those who end up divorced or separated when either one cannot take that a major event happened.
That’s ao sad. Life is so ephemeral
I'm sorry for your loss.
4:24 At this point I couldn't stop myself from crying , like oml
4:24 At this point I couldn't stop myself from crying , like oml
this life is a sad joke....hurt so bad to hear her say that
The only mothers that can't stop crying are the ones that their kids have committed suicide, because it's easier to accept a destiny that you can't change, that to accept someone acting upon their destiny, and then you feel guilt and think what you did wrong and ask yourself these questions with no answer every day... I lost my soul mate 3 months ago and I do feel all those things still, what I could change and failed to do...
I dont know what i should feel watching this video, im drinking and want to have a good cry (sometimes thats all we need), just like the parents in this vid, i am afraid that they cant move on from my suicide
This is heartbreaking
suicide won't take the pain away, it will only give it to people that love you that will lose you
“I feel like I have had a cataract operations and you see the world with a different set of lenses in your eyes.”
I don't know, I always felt that suicide is a terrible option but never did I think, I'll end up prefering it. But that very time, only parents flashed before my eyes so till now I have held things strong. Suicide needs no reason, it's just sudden and idky. After seeing this video, I really don't want to put anyone at this place. STAY STRONG EVERYONE! We've come this far! we'll reach more
i am struggling so hard with depression. it's very hard to keep on living and to find the reason to do so. but i am trying my best to fight my depression and urges to commit suicide for my family. I don't want them to feel the hurt i am feeling right now. i just wish this will end.
As I’m watching this video I got into a fight with my parents I want to say I’m sorry and I love you but it’s really hard for me to say stuff like that
they are so strong, I'm ugly sobbing.
I come back to this video from time to time. As Max's friend in university, I remember his energy and his REALLY tall height and how nice and caring he was to everyone. I hope his parents stay healthy. Thank you for sharing this story.
Lionel Lim
17 dni temu
Many thanks for remembering Max, from Max's family
I had a friend who used to tell me that she was going to commit suicide, she always told me the same thing and suddenly she came with cuts on her arms and I was always worrying and worrying doing everything possible so that nothing would happen to her, I talked to my parents about the situation and tried to make mine reason with hers, until I realized that she was manipulating me, the girl wanted attention, probably because of how she felt being at home or other problems, I never knew why, but I cross the line when she cut and made my initials and hers within a broken heart, I know that everyone faces their fight and that's why sometimes they act in a certain way but she threatened to kill herself if I didn't listen to her and be with her all day. And all this entering the first year of high school letting her take advantage of me all that year until finally in second year she reacts, and I walked away. Fortunately it did not go wrong, she seemed to understand a little more what she had done (I hope so) and well now I think she is a little more stable, I am very sorry that I could not have understood what was happening with her and with me before things were will begin to complicate. Thanks for reading me 🌒 What would you have done in my place?
is this what I would put my parents through?
After watching this all i wanna do is hug them for long time ... this pain they will never forget it.... 4 years ago i lost my uncle (my mom brother ) in a car accident And i still can't forget him and forget his smile , everything about him i can't let him go out of my mind and that hurts me alot
the thing about suicide is that people who killed themselves didnt want to die. They wanted peace
Whatbis suicide? If u commit suicide u r not taking only ur life. U will take so many loved ones lives. 😢 Been dead is easy may be but loved one who is still alive without u will face death pain every second. Dont commit suicide please.
Im so sorry to hear that. I cant image how its painful to you. I wish you guys have the happiness and recovering in life.
I think it is inappropriate to ask these questions
I'm in love with the parent couple, the dad is an amazing person. He felt first sorry for his kid's friends, and how he reminisces his kid was able to fall in love and live a good life. They're very positive and handle grief very well. I hope they're fine. Good people.
Lionel Lim
17 dni temu
Many thanks from Max's parents
my heart goes out to all these parents
4:30 i- Y'all don't cry too much it can cause I death.
these parents are so strong
sorry for your loss :(((
i know this was in 2019 and i know all the mothers and the father are still in pain (obviously since they lost their children), but max’s mom just saddens me so much :( i hope she is able to find peace within herself
Lionel Lim
17 dni temu
Thanks for your support & encouragement. Yes the pain is real & always there but we are coping better now, especially Max's mom. We learn to focus on other things now, small steps with each passing day......
whenever i think on trying to kill myself again i'll come back here
rhaeena
25 dni temu
@Fluffy Puffy thank you very much ❤️
Fluffy Puffy
25 dni temu
I believe in you. I am so proud of you. Never give up! ❤️
I have no sympathy for the parents, they are the reason their child existed to suffer in the first place.
Camilla Shimwa
26 dni temu
@PLclip Account so your solution is to just not have children. You need some help Fr Fr.
Youtube Account
26 dni temu
@Camilla Shimwa no, that is a false comparison. We already know that if someone doesnt eat food they will feel pain and die, so then eating would be a necisary risk. Who had ever felt pain and died from not having children like how someone who doesnt eat anything would? And even if they did, that still doesnt justify causing other lives to suffer and be at risk.
Camilla Shimwa
26 dni temu
@PLclip Account so your saying ppl just shouldn’t have kids? That’s like saying there’s a possibility to choke on food so you don’t eat anymore. You’re making no sense. Anyone can die including kids. Yes it’s sad but it’s a part of life
Youtube Account
26 dni temu
@Camilla Shimwa parents know that there is a risk of those and many other horrible things happening to the child. And then horrible things happen, the child suffers
Camilla Shimwa
26 dni temu
@PLclip Account Chile- how were they supposed to know the child was gonna die. No one expects that when they have a child.